"Sweet Creaming Soda of Satan!" you have just yelled at your electricophotonic-display device. If you haven't, do it now - it's fun.

Why did you do this? It's specifically related to the fact that your afore-to-now impoverished intellect just comprehended the ridiculously magnificent Troysk's Tardmoid.

This elegant yet colossal beast is fairly new to science and boasts several fascinating characteristics. Read them after the following full-stop.

- A long suspension-bridge like neck composed of both mammalian-esque vertebrae and hinged bone structure.

- A docile nature in most situations. Note its depicted use by Lord Cockswain as a hunting platform.

- A startlingly non-docile manner when confronted with rivals to mating. Behold the charged and highly aggressive dueling depicted in the supplied illustration. They are very, very cross!

- Most surprising perhaps is the Tardmoid's lack of feeding aperture or mouth.
Speculations have varied from a Baleen Whale style of sifting for atmospherically-born micro-organisms, through to it simply surviving on air like some sort of aspirational super-hippy.

Troysk's Tardmoid was named and discovered on sabbatical jaunt by Dr. O. Troysk, one of Dr. Grordbort's keenest up and coming minds. Famed within the lab for his insightful observations on both fundamental particles and women's lingerie, Troysk was voted 'Least Hate-able Employee' at Dr. Grordbort's Industries in a 1924 inter-office poll.

He slipped down the ranking shortly after when it was discovered he was in fact a total dick.

Vital Statistics:

Height: 18 to 22 feet
Length: 20 to 28 feet
Weight: 3 to 6 tons

Additional images (click to enlarge)

Related Products: