Crudmobot 370, a fine piece of Grordbortian manufacturing if ever we saw one, was initially programmed for helping the elderly and gardening. But not anymore!

"Dear Doctor, I just wanted to inform you that I think my head is partially repurposed wave weapon components. While changing Eldritch Fuddle Senior's man-diaper, to stop himself from slipping, he grabbed my head to balance. Something clicked. In a blinding flash of electricity and excremental vapour his entire mid section was gone.

That was a surprise, for both of us. My surprise circuits almost melted in fact, and my regret valve just imploded, fused solid. Anyoldway, just thought you might be interested to know that, and that my new job as a truck mounted heavy gun for the French Foreign Legion is going spiffingly. I am now disintegrating minorities I had never even heard of!"