Pomson, by golly!
The Pomson 6000 has been described thus:
Blasting out rapid-succession pulses of cross-spectrum electromagnetic radiation, the Pomson has been shown to dissolve an Egyptian pyramid in four archeologically educational weeks or one of the smaller, slightly crappier Mayan ones in just under a fortnight. Imagine what it could do to that big ugly Mars face! On a more practical level, however, the Pomson has proven to be a highly flexible yet powerful firearm and purchasers are sure to wake up each morning with morning wood at the mere thought of owning one. That could also be a tumourous growth caused by unshielded radiation, but you can't sue us for that because it's in the contract. Sod off.
